time to get back on track

i think it was around my birthday when i was actually starting to make some strength gains and lose some fat. this momentum was short-lived and i have since lost some visible muscle and gained back a bunch of body fat. i'm sure most people don't really notice and just look at me regardless and think, that guy is short and stocky, both back in early september and currently. but when i look in the mirror, i notice.

while i can only truly blame myself, there have been some external factors that have caused some admittedly avoidable roadblocks, but roadblocks nonetheless. i went on a trip where i ate a ton of bad food. i also joined a kickball league, which meant tons of drinking and eating out in the middle of the week. on top of that, i managed to severely injure my ankle, as i have done about 4 other times in my life, during the final kickball game. being an idiot, i kept on playing and as a result, could not put any pressure on it for the next 2 days, hopping around like lisa turtle during the dance competition.

this ankle injury has left me with another sad realization, in that 2 weeks later it is still not even close to being 100%. when i injured it in high school i was running around without issue 2 days later. this was definitely a good marker for aging and could be a seemingly insignificant moment i wistfully look back on 20 years from now as when i truly realized i was no longer a kid. i am already imagining this being one of those injuries oldies bitch about hurting just cause the weather changed...ugh.

anyways, the swelling has gone down and is still there, but much better. my range of motion is slooooooowly returning. i can walk without any sort of limp, but can't really even jog on it without a few sharp pains. overall, i would put the ankle at about 70%.

i am anxious to begin reversing the doughification that has been going on with my body the last 10 weeks and while i certainly need to get my diet back on track, getting back to the gym will help keep me motivated and just feeling better as a whole. so i am thinking tonight is the night. i should be fine with most exercises and will generally ease my way back into the swing of things, hoping to do about 70% of what i had been doing prior. i am most concered with squats and power cleans. i hope my ankle and foot are stable enough. i hope i don't reinjure it. i hope i don't get sloppy, turn it a weird way, get a sharp pain and collapse under the bar. i just have to put my ego aside and be cautious in my return to the gym.

another contemplative career change rambling

recently i have been working out with various friends and it has been a good time. nicki joined my gym and we had a pretty serious workout session as she was giving me frequent dirty looks and cursed interval sprints. she needs to get stronger in her upper body as she has aspirations of being a firefighter. on saturday i worked out with dan and phil and i ran them through a typical workout i do. they both did well although dan kept mentioning that he thought he was gonna pass out...i think that means he just needs to work harder. phil discovered that something is not quite right when he tries to deadlift, but he did well with the squat.

i think the point of this is that i enjoy working out with people and enjoy any teaching or coaching that goes along with having a little more experience on the subject. i obviously don't know enough to really be a trainer, but it is nice to find a subject that does not involve videogames, drinking or watching tv that i actually find fascinating and enjoy. along with this is a very strong interest in nutrition and how it goes together with training. more and more i am nerding out on this stuff.

going back to school to pursue something like becoming a nutritionist or trainer is definitely something that runs through my mind, especially when i am feeling particularly tired of and frustrated by my boring computer job. currently i am a little hesitant in working with others as i feel like i am in that limbo area of knowing enough to get myself into trouble, but not enough that i can confidently give advice on these subjects. i want to help, but am not in any way trained to assess someone's strength and other various issues. i read stuff and know how things work with my body, but i realize that that perspective is very limiting. for instance, dan broke his arm in high school (not my fault) and because of this he has some pretty uneven shoulders. he tried some dips and it did not feel right. i wanted to try and give him some different exercise that would work better, but i was not confident in having him try something else, as i did not want to fuck his shoulder up. phil was having trouble maintaining his form during his deadlifts and i guessed that it was his hip mobility, but had no real expertise or experience to really explain why i thought that was the issue.

(phil rounds out his lower back and has a painful expression)
me: that doesn't look right phil.
phil: no shit. it doesn't feel right either.
me: hmmm...i bet it's a lack of hip mobility.
phil: why do you think that?
me: i dunno.
phil: ...
me: i guess this exercise is not for you.

another thing to consider is that if i were to ever become something in training or nutrition, i would need to look the part as i don't think people like taking advice from do as i say not as i do types. i picked up a program called precision nutrition, that dave and i plan on studying and following. it seems to do a really good job of explaining the basics of nutrition and how to apply it. i think that it could serve as a good indicator of whether or not i really have an interest in this type of thing. also, it will hopefully help us lose some weight.

i realize that i have been writing and whining about this stuff a lot lately, but writing it out helps me gather my thoughts and will hopefully lead to some sort of action. if anyone has any lifting or nutrition questions, post them in the comments and it will give me a chance to research it and give you a (hopefully) helpful answer. even if you don't really need to know, make something up, it will give me some practice and something to do when i am bored at work.

another long and drawn out post of a personal nature that will not interest you

my gym is sort of interesting. it's kind of a weird mix between a lame commercial gym and a more serious strength training facility. i have witnessed a lot of headshaking things. often times it's some well-intentioned, but misguided exerciser doing waste of time exercises like the chest press station or those hip abductor machines. or i see someone doing some exercise with obviously poor form. this often leads me wondering what i should do. as i mentioned in my last post, i want to be more helpful in everyday life. maybe i should politely point out their error in form or exercise choice and explain how to correct it. but then again, who the fuck am i? i'm not one of the trainers. i don't hold any certification in training (although i find most of the trainers in my gym to have very questionable certifications). i am getting in better shape, but am still fat. would i listen to me if i was someone else? its tough to say. nobody likes to look foolish or be told they are wrong. also, somebody who knows a little, but thinks they know a lot (i am referring to me) is way more obnoxious and potentially dangerous than someone who admittedly knows nothing. then again, i want to help and don't want anyone to waste their time doing stuff that won't work or may even injure them. and another thing...there are a lot of other people in much better shape and with more experience there...why don't they say anything?

when i am at the gym, i keep to myself. i have my headphones on and rarely get into conversations. i focus on what i am trying to do that day and don't make an effort to watch other people, but it just happens. here are a few examples of stuff i have seen recently that have left me shaking my head and wondering whether or not it would be appropriate to step in:

2 women lifting - there are these 2 middle-aged women at the gym that do the same things over and over again with no progression. their routine seems to be pretty solid in that they do a lot of free weights and stay away from lame lifting machines or even the smith machines. but they have 2 habits that drive me fucking insane. they both get into the only 2 squat racks in the gym and proceed to do bicep curls with just the bar and a 5 lb plate on each side. this is ridiculous in that if you are going to do bicep curls, you can do them anywhere else, why take up the precious squat racks? there is an area of the gym specifically for doing curls, but apparently that will not do. or they could at least just use one rack and alternate. secondly, they don't put the weights aways when they finish. they just make a mess with loose weights and extra bars laying all over the place and don't bother to put anything back when they go off and do something else. i am often the one waiting around to use the racks, and then end up havving to put all of their shit back to make room. do i say something? tell them to lift heavy or gtfo?

fat asian guy - there is this other fat asian guy who is more or less where i was before i started lifting. i've noticed him drifting around from machine to machine looking pretty clueless. i had noticed that he had started to try the exercises i was doing, but his form was awful and he was trying to lift too heavy to start out. i chose to just stay out of it, but thought that eventually i might say something to him. well yesterday he was in there working out with some fool wearing jeans. this guy also had no idea what he was doing, but was showing the asian guy exercises like he was a trainer. he was showing him the bench press, but put on way too much weight and was essentially doing bent over rows while yelling "all you!". the blind leading the blind. do i approach the guy and tell him to ditch his buddy? do i give him some unsolicted pointers? or will i basically just look like his jean wearing friend (a know-it-all who does not in fact know it all)?

new gym member with "trainer" - yesterday may have been the final straw as i witnessed the idiocy of one of the gym's trainers working with a new gym member. this guy was showing the girl box squats. while this is a very good exercise, he made no effort to show her how to do it with good form. he almost dropped a bunch of plates on her head when he was lifting up one end of the bar to lower the rack pins. in my first ever intervening, i rushed over and caught the plates seconds before they fell off the bar and onto her head. i checked the trainer's shirt. yup, it said "personal trainer" in big bold letters across the back. i went back to squatting. between sets i noticed that even though he lowered the rack pins, they were still about 3 inches too high for the girl and she actually had to get under and press the bar overhead to get it off. this is ridiculous and i stare in amazement in hopes that the trainer sees me and asks why i am staring. no luck and i go back to lifting, hoping that the girl does not get hurt while under the supervision of this guy who most likely got his certification after a 30 minute online seminar. should i have stepped in and suggested that he lower the pins? should i have explained that she should not be trying to press a weight she can barely box squat? should i have explained to the "expert" that she is not supposed to sit on the box for 5 seconds between each rep?

these are the types of issues that i struggle with most days i am at the gym. again, i do not consider myself an expert in lifting or exercise science. i think i just know a little more than the average joe gymdude. i did work in physical therapy offices throughout college and i do nerd out a lot, reading stuff at work, because i find it very interesting at the moment...it may have taken up the hole that was left behind after i stopped caring as much about fantasy football. speaking of fantasy football, i am matched up against laura, whose team is ridiculously hot as of late. i am pretty sure that i will lose, but you never know.

back to lifting and training...i do really enjoy lifting with people i know and like helping them learn if i happen to know more than them. starting tomorrow i will be volunteering at the special olympics powerlifting group, so that should be fun. i wonder if i had begun lifting in college, would i have chosen a different career path? i could see myself enjoying this kind of work, even though i am sure the pay is pretty shitty. i think i would become very knowledgeable since i actually find this stuff fascinating. i dunno. part of all of this thinking is based on my current hatred of (or at least extreme lack of enthusiasm towards) my stable, decent paying office job. i know i will eventually need to reexamine my career and find something that i care about, but it's all very overwhelming and scary to think about. in the meantime i will slack at work, continue to try to get in better shape and probably just watch in horror as people do dumb stuff at the gym.