i am no jon arbuckle

gonna take a quick break from my star trek story to note a recent revelation i had about my life. now i know i whine and complain about girls and stuff a lot on this blog, but whatever, that's what blogs are for sometimes. that's just the way it's gotta be sometimes. anyways, i took jessie to the vet last night as her ears have been bothering her. they also had to test her urine to make sure her uti was gone. well they got the sample and brought her back to the exam room where i was. jessie then begins to pee. not her normal squat and pee maneuver i have seen thousands of times. she was just standing as if nothing was going on and pee was shooting out from behind like she suddenly sprung a leak. i immediately yelled for her to stop and made her move. i quickly grabbed some paper towels, hoping i could clean it up before anyone noticed. then i looked at jessie, now peeing where i moved her to. it was ridiculous. i was scrambling around trying to clean up what ended up being about 10 different puddles of pee in something out of a stupid movie. this ridiculousness lasted about 5 minutes and i was able to "clean" it up, but as soon as the vet came in, i was like, we gotta change rooms.

ah, the new vet. she was of course really cute and age appropriate and she seemed to really like jessie. i considered trying to chat her up a little bit beyond the normal pet stuff, but who are we kidding? anyways, at one point during this visit, i looked at big fat, brindle jessie and wondered, is my life turning into a real life version of garfield? where i have a crush on my vet who takes care of my slovenly, striped pet? this realization was about 60% amusing, 40% depressing.

you be the judge

last week, dave discovered that jessie has an interesting reaction to the beautiful sounds of a harmonica. the root of this reaction became a hotly debated topic in our household as louise insists that jessie does not like the sounds coming from dave's mouth harp and does not like us doing it. dave and i disagree, thinking that she loves it and is trying to sing along or harmonize. i have no basis for this theory, but i believe that dogs are musical creatures. nicky on the other hand is on the fence and while she finds it as hilarious and cute as dave and i, she is unsure if the reaction is actually a positive one.



what do you think? you will notice that her tail is wagging the whole time, possibly displaying her enjoyment. the sounds coming out of her mouth are a little questionable, but her vocal training is limited at best. the expression on her face shows a look of concern, but i like to believe that is just her getting into it. i also remember nick's dog, buck, who often enjoyed following us to where we played music and howled along, often appearing in many of the song we recorded. you can also hear nicky giggling in the background as dave and jessie perform their duet. louise theorizes that something about the sound of the harmonica possibly disorients jessie. i obviously would not want to torture my dog, so if you think she is showing her disapproval or she is upset by the music, let me know.

is it wrong to mock my dog?

many of you have met and gotten to know my dog, jessie, who has subpar intelligence. ok...as far as i know, she isn't actually "stupid", but i like to tell her that she is every day. while dave and i find this type of mocking and ribbing endlessly funny and amusing, louise, playing the part of jessie's overprotective mother, is very much against this type of activity.

part of the reason i do this is, as described, it is funny to me, but it also partly because jessie is so babied and spoiled by louise, i figure this kind of evens things out. let's face it...i like to keep things real.
jessie is a dog, and due to this fact, she is not as smart as me and she cannot comprehend what i am saying, unless it's something like "i wish you were never born." so if i say something making fun of her intelligence, laziness, overall lack of fitness, bad licking habits or poor hygiene, she just thinks i am talking about what i am going to feed her next.
obviously i love my dog...more than i ever thought i would when we first got her 3 years ago. she is the perfect dog for me and people living in my house. she is very sweet-natured, always chillin and very low-maintenance. she does things that make me laugh all of the time. she can sense when i am sick and will try to make me feel better. i know if it ever came down to it, jessie would selflessly jump in to protect me. i really could not imagine a better dog than jessie.
with all of that in mind, i still like to explain to jessie that we could make another dog out of her excessive neck skin. i still call her dumb-dumb. i like to detail our plans of replacing her with a "good" dog. even though she doesn't smell (most of the time) i like to tell her that her odor is making people feel ill. i obviosly could go on.

i assume that this is harmless fun, but who knows? i assume she knows i love her and i also assume she doesn't understand what i am saying. beyond it being absurdly juvenille, are there any reasons i should take it down a notch? or squash it cold turkey?

buck

i saw buck at the rivetti family christmas party on saturday. he looked ok...especially considering he is a reasonably large dog and a ridiculous 14 years old. i seem to think that he might even be older than that because i am sure i remember buck being around when i hung out with nick in middle school. anyways, it was really nice to see him. while he no longer barks a lot when people walk in through the front door, he still has the same goofy expression on his face and still seems to get around ok.

i guess the significance of all this for me is that buck is definitely a part of my childhood. he was the first dog i ever really got to know. i have fond memories of him howling and barking over us playing and recording music at nick's house. i remember him getting in trouble for getting out of the backyard and chasing some horrified neighborhood kid down the street. i remember when he ate and then subsequently shit out a rag. one of bub's friends had a knack for luring buck to put his front paws on his shoulders and then walking (air-humping) his way with him around the room. there are countless other memories.

bub made a comment saying that this is buck's last christmas, which made me sad, but it sounds like after 14 years, the rivetti family is more or less ready for the inevitable. maybe he will be around this time next year, who knows? his longevity also gives me a little hope that jessie will be around for a long time or until i get tired of her and return her to the woods. here's to jessie snoring on my couch for another 10 years...