Friday, May 30, 2008

vacation forecast

as i mentioned yesterday, we are headed to the dominican republic pretty soon. i booked this trip so long ago and have been anticipating it so much that it feels a little weird that it is actually approaching. i tend to get real hyped up for trips where i am constantly reading reviews and any info i can get on where i am going. this will be my first trip to an "all-inclusive" resort and i hope to make good use of the inclusives.

with all of this in mind, i realize that the trip will not be perfect and i like to have reasonable expectations. here are a few things that i predict will happen.
  1. i will get sick from drinking way too much the first day we arrive.
  2. louise will hesitantly enter the water after i make fun of her...she will see a fish or a shell or some seaweed, shriek and run out of the water.
  3. i will bring many books with the intention of reading and end up reading a total of 20 pages.
  4. i will learn the hard way that you should not get too close to the wildlife.
  5. louise will get tons of bug bites while i remain blissfully bite-free.
  6. i will describe to louise how upon our return, i plan on picking jessie up and tossing her in the air like a pizza pie.
  7. neither of us will get sunburned...just kidding...louise + domrep sun = curly-haired lobster
  8. our attempts at speaking spanish will be embarassing.
  9. i will see a coconut tree...boast to louise about how i could climb said tree and retrieve a coconut...after giving up quickly, i explain to louise how coconuts are over-rated.
  10. louise will have numerous flip-flop malfunctions.
  11. i will really enjoy interacting with the staff, who seem so friendly...yet in the back of my mind i worry that they secretly hate me.
  12. archery will not be as fun as expected.
  13. the swim-up bar will be more fun than expected.
  14. louise will do her poor jamaican accent.
  15. i will be cautious with my money at the casino.
  16. i will find, purchase and wear a big stupid hat that louise hates.

yeah! drink up stupid american douchebag!

No comments: