the new dramatic chipmunk?

so here is the new video of the thx lemur. it's pretty cool and frightening at the same time. you probably shouldn't watch this video if you happen to be on mushrooms or acid right now.


i don't like how he is smiling at me but i think he needs to team up with aphex twin.

hey ya'all!

i realize that this is becoming a very pop culture heavy blog and as a result, i wanted to make a quick post about britney spears. i know, i know...kind of a lame topic that everyone and their mom has been blogging about for the last 5 years. i don't care.

my journey with britney begins back when she had that catholic school girl video. i don't remember when it came out, but i know i was way too old to be attracted to her. and such was the case, in that she never really appealed to me. i remember just not getting it. i guess she was sort of cute back in the day...but certainly less cuter than most other young female celebrities at the time. my problem with her was probably based on the dumb in her eyes. i don't care how technically attractive someone is...dumb just ruins it. case in point: jessica simpson...who i definitely do not find attractive, but am unsure if it's truly the dumb or if it's a combination of things....either way, the dumb has a big hand in it.

anyways, britney seemed to be doing well, putting out popular music that while not outright offensive in it's badness, pretty much defined inconsequential. she was in shape and the general public was unaware of the crazy that festered inside. she hooked up with and married dad of the year k-fed. then they managed to have a couple of kids.

well she got divorced and then has spent the last 2 years or so completely unraveling and being a spectacle in a manner that really could not have been more spectacular had it been done on purpose. i won't recount details as they are many and everyone knows about them.

so now her life is a mess. she's got problems...but is all of this her fault? apparently she was on star search at a real early age and then went on to be in the mickey mouse club show...or something like that. just taking a wild guess, but mom probably pushed this dream and lifestyle on a kid that didn't know any better. so she didn't really live a normal childhood and as a result is now incapable of handling adult life. she seems to have the emotional intelligence of a 12 year old and i don't see things improving.

just as i shunned her when she blew up, i empathize as she goes down in flames. i hear the associated press is already writing her obituary as they prepare for the inevitable. only time will tell.

am i changing my stance just to be difficult and against the grain? no phil, i am not.

do i think she is an idiot? yes.

does she bring the crazy? absolutely.

is it her fault? probably not.

should she hang out with even crazier celebrities to look not as crazy by comparison? let's hope.

will my so-called "empathy" stop me from posting super-crazy and unflattering pictures of britney spears?

update: if i were britney's agent/publicist i would arrange for her to hang out with the following people:

• bobby brown and whitney houston
• liza minelli
• tyra banks
• bruce vilanch
• tom cruise
• star jones
  
• most recent cast of the real world
• anyone affiliated with the westboro baptist church

who else would help britney appear less crazy?

remember tv funhouse?

i have found memories of a short-lived television show, tv funhouse. this was the brainchild of genius robert smigel who is responsible for triumph the comic insult dog, the tv funhouse shorts on snl and many other retarded things. i really love triumph, but this show, at least as i remember, completely outclassed anything else smigel has done.

the basic premise was a kid's variety tv show hosted by an affable and alcoholic host. initially it would seem like a vanilla version of peewee's playhouse, but this show clearly took things to another level. first off, the show was very animal-centric, which i always appreciate. there was an absurd pairing of live animals interacting with puppet animals. the show was on long ago enough that i am having trouble remembering specifics. i also find it very odd that i never hear about this show anymore...it seemed destined to live on forever as a cult show.

i searched youtube and found this clip:

that's all i could find. seriously? how did this not make it on to dvd...because i think the general public is ready for it and it would be quickly embraced.

i do have one specific memory that since i have not lost it yet, will probably be with me forever. it was a 5 minute sketch of all of these animals acting like people, eating in a restaurant. of course there was the obligatory mix of live animals interspersed among the puppet animals from which most of the dialog was coming from. anyways, the focus is on one table consisting of recurring characters on the show. they are all having a normal conversation and then order their meals. one character, which was a lobster ordered the lobster...which seemed pretty ridiculous to me at the time...but whatever...i was along for the ride. the conversation continues and then all of the meals are presented. all of the animals start chowing down and the lobster just kind of looks at his plate of lobster and nonchalantly requests a doggy bag to take his food home. the rest of the animals kind of shrug their shoulders and get back to eating. the lobster quickly and nervously takes his doggy bag and leaves the restaurant. next shot: it shows the lobster having sex with the dead lobster that he ordered for dinner.

...and i will leave it at that. these were the types of messed up things that occurred on this show that made it hard to watch and awesome at the same time. i hope to see it on dvd soon.

because i like lasagna...of course

this past week or so i have seen 2 movies that both exceeded my expectations, but also make me a little embarrassed to praise. smiley face was a movie that louise and i had had our eyes on for a while. it basically looked like harold and kumar but with a girl. that girl being the very cute and underrated anna farris (who also kind of sounds like my roommate). either way, it was very funny and i personally thought her performance was hilarious...which i don't often say about female comedic actors. it was obviously ridiculous and over the top but captured the mindset of someone who is way too high very well. her "meta" thought process on garfield was spot on and besides the image of her sloppily running down the street may have been the most memorable part of the movie for me.

the other questionable movie that i really enjoyed this week was the brothers solomon. it stars will forte and will arnett as 2 brothers trying to have a baby. it is also ridiculous and unbelievable, but manages to be hilarious, if not a little uneven. i like both actors as well as co-stars kristen wiig and chi mcbride. there weren't particularly good videos on youtube for this movie, so i won't post any. but just know that the gags are plentiful. it got awful reviews (probably deservedly so), but that didn't stop me from enjoying it and buying it when it is on sale at best buy for $4.99.

again, with both of these movies, don't expect them to be "good" or "well-written" in the traditional sense. just know that if you are in the mood for a silly movie that, if you have a similar sense of humor as me, you will find funny, then i highly recommend both.

bento!

louise got me a bento box, which i have been wanting for a while. it is essentially a lunch container that is divided up into little sections (almost like those classic tv dinner containers, but much nicer looking). i believe the idea is to create an aesthetically pleasing array of colors with your food, while at the same time allowing for various textures and tastes. this is my first experience with a bento box. i put the meal together last night. it consists of:

• a bean and cilantro salad i made
• red peppers
• alfalfa sprouts
• pepperoncini
• cheddar cheese
• triscuits
• a hard-boiled egg
• some organic peanut butter

i really should have included some sort of fresh fruit, but i didn't feel like going to the store last night and had to make due with what was already available in my kitchen. normally these are filled with japanese food as the bento box originates and is primarily used by the japanese, but i don't really cook japanese food (although louise did make me some delicious sushi earlier this week).

now i am brainstorming other items i may want to include in future bento meals. they have to be items that do not require heating. here's what i got so far:

• broccoli
• dark chocolate
• berries (black, rasp, straw, etc.)
• watermellon
• banana
• chips and salsa
• leftovers that can be eaten cold
• carrots
• tofu
• sushi
• grape tomatoes
• orange slices
• apple slices
• pineapple
• edemame
• zours
• string cheese
• salad
• jalapenos
• avocado slices

i could obviously go on and on, but those were the first items that came to mind. do you have ideas for stuff i can put in my new bento box?

you can call me tom hatey

maybe it is because i have been busy at work...but the last post and this one i am about to write are rant-esque...and i am sure if laura read this she would go on about how i am so angry all the time...which i don't think is true. overall i enjoyed the weekend, but the columbia thing and the nfl playoffs were unsatisfactory to me.

so we all knew that the patriots were going to the superbowl. philip rivers sucks and the patriots are the patriots. prior to the games on sunday, i was talking to dave about the playoffs and comparing it to star wars, where the patriots are obviously the dark side. tom brady is darth vader and bill belichek is the emperor. randy moss was boba fett. brett favre was supposed to be han solo. i'm not a star wars nerd, but i felt it was a fairly relevant comparison.

well favre and the packers went ahead and screwed things up. they were awful and lost a game that they should have easily won. they made eli manning look like a fairly adequate qb, which is not easy to do. maybe he's ok...i dunno...i think i just have a problem with the dumb look he has on his face all the time. the packers had soooo many chances to win the game. i don't remember a lot of game specifics, but i know the giants kicker missed at least 2 field goals from like 35 yards away..including a miss at the end of regulation that would have won the game for the giants. the packers even won the coin flip in overtime and favre threw an awful pass that resulted in an interception. it just wasn't meant to be i guess.

but now look at the awful mess of a super bowl we have. i really hate both teams, and chris' man-crush on antonio pierce aside, i don't think any of my friends wanted this either. i strongly dislike both teams and as a result, i really have no interest in watching the super bowl. i would have loved watching favre defy the odds and pull out a gritty win against the evil patriots...but instead we have stupid eli and the redskin rival giants facing the patriots in what will surely be an unamusing comedy of errors.

we had a stretch of good superbowls in the late 90's and early 00's. but the last few have been stinkers and this one may go down as my least favorite of all time. remember watching derrick mason coming one yard short of winning the superbowl at the end of the game for the titans? or remember watching john elway lead his team to victory...scrambling his old ass out of the pocket and taking a big hit that flipped him around...just to get the first down? well that's not gonna happen this year. instead we have 2 very unlikeable teams (at least to me) that will play a boring game in which the patriots will abuse the giants like i abused phil in left-handed arm wrestling.